Learn five simple, everyday things you can do to raise kids who aren't held back by gender stereotypes.

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#LeanInTogether
TIPS FOR MEN: HOW TO BE AN ALL-STAR DAD
Get the complete tips at leanin.org/tips/dads
Jodi Jacobson/Getty Images

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Involved dads raise happier, healthier, and more
successful children.1
Moreover, kids benefit when that involvement goes beyond the
traditional paternal role. When dads model equality at home,
their daughters and sons grow up envisioning more possibilities
for themselves. Telling your kids “you can do anything” is not
nearly as effective as showing them they can!
TIPS FOR MEN:
HOW TO BE AN ALL-STAR DAD

3. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
1SITUATION
There’s simply no substitute for hands-on fathering. Children with
involved fathers have higher self-esteem, better cognitive and
social skills, fewer behavioral problems, and higher academic
achievement.2
Be an active and involved dad. Help with homework, read books
together, talk about your kids’ daily experiences and dreams. You
don’t have to be perfect- you just have to be engaged.
SOLUTION
1 BE AN ACTIVE FATHER

4. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men#LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
One survey found that
boys were 15% more likely
than girls to get paid for
doing chores.3

5. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
2 CLOSE THE WAGE GAP AT HOME
SITUATION
Parents often place greater value on the chores boys typically do
(like taking out the trash) than on chores that girls usually do (like
setting the table). As a result, boys spend less time on household
chores but make more money than girls.4
SOLUTION
Give your children equal chores and equal allowance. It's also
important to show your kids what 50-50 looks like by sharing
housework with your partner.

6. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men#LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
Watch what your daughter
watches—women are often
underrepresented or
sexualized in the media.

7. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
SITUATION
SOLUTION
3 CHALLENGE GENDER STEREOTYPES
Kids’ beliefs are shaped by the world around them, and girls are
often sent the wrong messages. Traditional girls’ toys focus on
appearance and caretaking, while boys’ toys focus on
competition and spatial skills.5
Moreover, children's books are
twice as likely to feature a male character in the lead role.6
Have your kids play with a variety of toys, and be thoughtful
about what they read and watch on TV. Talk with your kids about
the messages in media about women and men.

8. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men#LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
Girls' self-esteem drops 3.5
times more than boys
between elementary and
high school.7

9. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
SOLUTION
4 HELP YOUR DAUGHTER LEAD
SITUATION
As early as middle school, parents place a higher value on leadership
for boys than for girls.8
Girls are often labeled “bossy” when they take
the lead, and they're called on less in class and interrupted more than
boys.9
These factors often discourage girls from leading.
Celebrate your daughter's efforts to lead. Help her set goals and
reach outside her comfort zone. Encourage her to participate in
sports or other organized activities.

10. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men#LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
Telling a boy to “man up”
can be as damaging to his
self-esteem as calling
a girl “bossy.”

11. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
SOLUTION
5 DON’T TELL YOUR SON TO MAN UP
SITUATION
Movies, video games, and comic books offer boys stories of men
who are strong, aggressive, and in charge but rarely vulnerable or
nurturing. Boys often emulate these oversimplified characters. You
can model a more complete definition of manhood.
Encourage your son to respect his own feelings and have empathy
for others, and avoid language like "man up," which can be as
damaging to boys as "bossy" is to girls.

12. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
When men lean in for equality, they win—and so does everyone else.
Men have an important role to play in reaching equality, and
everyone benefits when they do. Children with involved fathers are
happier, healthier, and more successful. Couples who share
responsibilities have stronger marriages. Diverse teams and
companies produce better results.
Leaning in is not just the right thing to do—it’s the smart thing to do.
Learn more at leanin.org/men
PROUD TO
#LEANINTOGETHER

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ENDNOTES
1 For a thorough review, see Michael E. Lamb, TheRoleof theFather in Child Development (Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley
& Sons, 2010); Anna Sarkadi etal., “Fathers’ Involvementand Children’sDevelopmental Outcomes: A Systematic
Review of Longitudinal Studies,” Acta Paediatrica 97, no. 2 (2008): 153–58; and Sarah Allen and KerryDaly, The
Effects of Father Involvement: An Updated Research Summary of the Evidence (Guelph,ON: CentreforFamilies,
Work & Well-Being, 2007); Craig S. Garfield, AnthonyIsacco, and WendyD. Bartlo, “Men’sHealth and Fatherhood in
the Urban Midwestern United States,” International Journal of Men’sHealth 9, no. 3 (2010): 161–74; StephanieL.
Brown et al., “Caregiving BehaviorIsAssociated with Decreased Mortality Risk,” PhysiologicalScience20, no. 4
(2009): 488–94; and Joseph H. Pleck and Brian P. Masciadrelli, “Paternal Involvementin U.S. ResidentialFathers:
Levels, Sources, and Consequences,” in TheRoleof theFatherin Child Development, ed. Michael E. Lamb (Hoboken,
NJ: John Wiley& Sons, 2004): 222–71.
2 For a thorough review, see Lamb, TheRoleof the Father in Child Development; Sarkadi et al., “Fathers’ Involvement
and Children’sDevelopmental Outcomes,” pp. 153–58; and Allen and Daly, TheEffectsof FatherInvolvement.
3 Institute forSocial Research, Time, Money, and Who DoestheLaundry, Universityof Michigan,Research Update
(2007),
http://deepblue.lib.umich.edu/bitstream/handle/2027.42/61984/chores.pdf;jsessionid=078CC6AA26FE5BDFB6482
CE63BB0F4F1];
4 Institute forSocial Research, Time, Money, and Who DoestheLaundry; and “GenderPayGap Starts at Home as
Boys Earn Morefor Household Chores,” surveyby PktMny(2013), http://www.gohenry.co.uk/blog/gender-pay-gap/
5 Judith E. Owen Blakemore and Rene E. Centers, “Characteristicsof Boys’ and Girls’ Toys,” Sex Roles 53, nos. 9–10
(2005): 619–33.

14. #LeanInTogether | LeanIn.Org/Men
6 Mykol C. Hamilton et al., “GenderStereotyping and Under-representation of Female Characters in 200 Popular
Children’sPictureBooks: A Twenty-first CenturyUpdate,” Sex Roles55, nos. 11–12(2006):757–65 .
7 American Association of University Women, Shortchanging Girls, Shortchanging America (1991).
http://www.aauw.org/files/2013/02/shortchanging-girls-shortchanging-america-executive-summary.pdf.
8 Kathleen Mullan Harrisand J. Richard Udry, National Longitudinal Study of AdolescentHealth (Add Health), 1994–
2008, ICPSR21600-v14,Chapel Hill, NC:Carolina PopulationCenter, Universityof North Carolina at Chapel Hill/Ann
Arbor, MI: Inter-universityConsortiumforPolitical and Social Research,
http://www.icpsr.umich.edu/icpsrweb/ICPSR/studies/21600.
9 American Association of University Women, How SchoolsShortchangeGirls(1992)
http://www.aauw.org/files/2013/02/how-schoolsshortchange-girls-executive-summary.pdf;Myra Sadkerand
David M. Sadker, Failing atFairness: How Our SchoolsCheatGirls(NewYork: CharlesScribner’sSons, 1994); and
Elizabeth J. Whittet al., “Women’sPerceptionsof a ‘ChillyClimate’ and CognitiveOutcomesin College: Additional
Evidence,” Journal of CollegeStudentDevelopment40, no. 2(1999): 163–77.
ENDNOTES