1. afakeprofilecreatedbya
neighbourandherdaughter,
alongwithanotherteenage
girl.ThentherewasDaniel
Perry,the17-year-oldboyfrom
Fife,Scotland,wholeaptto
hisdeathfromabridgeafter
havingbeenbulliedandduped
intoablackmailscamonline.
Andtherearecountlessmore
suchtragiccases.Statistics
showthatoneinfivechildren
intheUK,andalmost50
percentofteenagersintheUS,
havebeenvictimsofcyber-
bullying.Theproblemisn’t
FromtheUStotheUK,a
shockingnumberofcasesof
onlineharassmenthavebeen
reportedinthepastdecade,
withmanyofthemresulting
insevereemotionaland
mentaltraumaforthevictim
orinsomecases,evensuicide.
TherewasMeganMeier,for
instance:The13-year-oldgirl
fromMissouriintheUS,who
hangedherselfinabedroom
closetafterhavingherself-
esteemutterlydestroyedby
acruelcyber-bullynamed
Josh—whoturnedouttobe
Thankstomoderntechnology,oursocialinteractionshave
movedbeyondface-to-faceinteractionstoanalmostboundless
domain.Butisthis24/7cultureofaccessibility—andtheveilof
anonymitythebluescreenprovides—givingwaytoanewbreed
ofanxietyintheformofcyber-bullies?
By Yi-Hwa Hanna
“Troll.”Irememberwhenthewordusedtoconjureup
imagesofalarge,brutish,one-eyedcreature,readyto
heckleandtormentpassers-byinacruelgamebefore
eventuallytryingtoeatthem.Nowitmeanssomething
different—though,muchlikethetrollunderthebridge
inthefamousNorwegianfairytale,thesetrollsalsolie
inhiding,takingpleasureinmakingtheirpreysuffer
beforeeventuallydestroyingthem.Butthemodern
daytrollisbetterathiding:Veiledunderacloakof
anonymity,theyremainhiddenbehindtheglow
ofacomputerscreen,gettingakickofoutmaking
deliberatelyoffensive,provocativeorhurtfulposts
onlinewiththeexplicitintentofupsettingsomeone
orelicitinganangryretort.
Don’tFeedThe
Trolls
96 W O M E N ' S H E A LT H M I D D L E E A S T / February 2015
Life and Love

2. Thebullyhasmovedfromthe
playgroundtolurkingbehinda
computerscreen,andthey’renot
justattackingkidsanymore
youforyourmoreunique
clothingchoicesisonething,
butifyou’vemadeitexplicitly
clearthattheircommentsare
distressingor,worse,hurtful,
andtheycarryon,they’re
beingabully—albeitacasual
one.“Ifyou’rebeingmade
tofeelangryorfrustrated,
putonedge,orasthough
you’reconstantlywalking
oneggshells,surroundedby
anxiousandnegativeenergy,
theseareallwarningsignsthat
youare,infact,beingbullied
tosomeextent,”Johannasays.
Sheaddsthatanincreased
desiretowithdrawfromyour
friendsorspendmoretime
inisolationcouldbeanother
pointtolookoutfor—afterall,
ifyou’rebeingmadetofeelso
uncomfortablethatyoudon’t
wanttospendasmuchtimein
theircompany,it’simportant
towonderwhy.
THEVICIOUSCIRCLE
Ifyou’rereceivingmessages
thataremean,vulgaror
threatening—whetherit’svia
privatemessageoronapublic
forum,beingimpersonated,
oryou’resufferingsomeone
postingcontentincluding
yourprivateorsensitive
informationorhumiliatingor
degradingphotosofyouonline
withoutyourpermission,
you’rebeingcyber-bullied.
Ifthelevelofbullyingis
soextremethatitinvolves
threatsofviolence,extortion,
obscenemessages,stalking
orhatecrimes,thisisserious
harassment—andit’stimeto
gettheauthoritiesinvolved.
Afterall,it’snotjustcelebrities
thathavehadtotakeout
restrainingordersagainst
internetharassers-turned-
stalkersthathavethreatened
themortheirlovedones,and
thankfullymostcountriesnow
havelawsinplacetoprotect
usfromwhatis,essentially,
acyber-crime.Evenifyou’ve
coveredtheriskofthings
leakingintoyourphysical
lifeandbecomingpotentially
dangerous,therearealsothe
emotionalandmentalrisks
toconsider—andthesearen’t
factorstobetakenlightly.
“[Beingbullied]canleave
youwithincreasedlevelsof
anxiety,stress,ordepression,
orasensethatyou’relosing
controlofyourself,yourlife
andyouremotions—which
couldleadtoyouhavingless
controloveryourmoodswings
orevenanger,”Johannasays,
addingthatitcouldalsoresult
inphysicalproblemssuchas
frequentheadachesortrouble
sleeping.“It’sdetrimental
becausemuchofthetime,
thebullywillbefocusingon
aspectsoftheindividualthat
theybelievetheymayalready
beself-consciousof,causing
themtoreflectmoreonwhat
thebullyissaying.Thisis
oftenexacerbatedifthebully
haspickeduponpre-existing
insecuritiesintheindividual,
whichunfortunatelybullies
canbeverygoodat,”says
Ross.“Beingbulliedaffects
ourpsycheinawaythatwe
questionthereasonwhy
wearebeingbullied.Such
questionssomeonemayask
themselvesare,‘Whyme?’
or‘WhatdidIdotodeserve
this?’”Thiscanbeginatrail
ofnegativethinkingabout
oneself,suchasself-blame,
self-pity,dwellingonand
BAD
BEHAVIOUR
According to a survey by
YouGov, although only
45% of adults have heard
of the term troll, 28% of
Americans admitted to
trollish behaviour, where
they had intentionally
directed malicious online
activity at someone they
didn’t know. In fact, 12%
admitted that they had
crossed the line so far in
some instances that their
comments had to be
removed by a moderator.
The survey results also
revealed that Internet
trolls are more likely to
men, particularly those
on the younger side—
millennials were found to
be the biggest culprits,
twice as likely to engage
in such behaviour.
limitedtotheWest—with
ourpenchantformobile
devicesandtheregion’shigh
internetandmobileusage
levels,it’snotsurprisingthat
thephenomenonhasfound
itswaytoourshores.The
resultsofa2013studyfound
that20percentofteenagers
intheUAEhavebeensubject
tosomeformofcyber-
bullying,andnewsoftwareby
XRayData.comdesignedto
alertparentsiftheirchildren
arebeingattacked,excluded
oremotionallyabusedonline
(oriftheirchildisdoingany
bullyingoftheirown)—in
bothEnglishandArabic—is
currentlyintheworks.
AGROWINGPROBLEM
It’snotjustimpressionable
teenagerssufferingatthe
handsoffacelessdigital
tormentors,either—adult
cyber-bullyingisaveryreal
problem,withsomeincidents
soviciousthatitcouldaffect
notonlyavictim’smental
wellbeingbutevenpotentially
costthemtheirjob,their
friends,ortheiroverallhealth.
Yes,thebullyhasmovedfrom
theplaygroundtolurking
behindacomputerscreen,
andthey'renotjustattacking
kidsanymore—it’sjustthat
bythetimewe’reallgrown
up,there’sanothername
forit:Harassment.Infact,
theconceptofbullyingisso
closelyinterlinkedtoyouth
thatmanyadultsdon’teven
realisethey’rebeingbullied—
oriftheydo,they’reafraidto
reportitlesttheybeknownas
over-sensitiveorweak.After
all,bythetimewe’readults,we
shouldknowbetterthantolet
bulliesgettous,right?
“Aswedevelopintoadults,
ourperceptionofbullying
oftenchanges;adultsmay
feelthattheycan’treportit
becauseit’ssomethingthat
onlyhappensinyouth,and
wemayinsteadseethistype
ofbehaviourasbeingmore
normalisedforadults.Youonly
havetolookonFacebookor
Twittertoseethevastamount
ofnegativeremarksthat
peoplemaketowardspictures
andstatusupdates,”saysRoss
Addison,aPsychotherapistat
CamaliClinicandamember
oftheWHMEAdvisory
Board.Thisnegativityisso
commonplacethatyoumight
notrealiseit’shappening,even
asitslowlychipsawayatyour
energy,confidenceandself-
esteem.“Whilstadultstendto
bemoreresilientinnaturedue
tohavingmorelifeexperience,
thisdoesnotremovethefact
thatremarksmadebypeople
thatintentionallyaffect
anindividual’semotional
wellbeinginanegativeway
isaformofbullying,”Ross
explains.Headds:“Social
networkingsitescanbeagreat
wayofcommunicating,[but]
unfortunatelysomeabusethis
systemanduseitasawayof
projectingandventingtheir
angertowardspeopleinaway
thatnegativelyaffectsanother
person’sfeelings.”
Thenthere’sthe
embarrassmentfactor.When
we’refeelingobligedto
conformtocertainopinions
orbeliefs,ortoactacertain
wayunderpeerpressure,it
canbetoughorevenshameful
toadmitthatit’smakingyou
feeluncomfortableandthat
youwantittostop—even
ifthosepressuringyoucan
clearlyseethatyou’resensitive
aboutacertaintopic,says
JohannaGriffin,aConsultant
atLifeWorksPersonal
Development.Afriend
constantlyorpubliclyribbing
February 2015 / W O M E N ' S H E A LT H M I D D L E E A S T 97

3. Oneresultofcyber-bullying
canbeextremesensitivityor
hypervigilancetotheaspectthe
bullyhasfocusedon
overthinkingonwhathas
beensaid,andcancausethe
individualtowonderwhythis
persondoesn’tlikethem—or
ifotherpeoplefeelthesame,
Rosssays.“Theresultofthis
canbeextremesensitivityand
hypervigilancetotheaspect
ortraitthebullyhasfocused
on,particularlywherethere
wasapre-existinginsecurity,
andmayleadtheindividual
toavoidineverywaypossible
beingsubjectedtoorleaving
themselvesexposedtothis
again,”heexplains.Butis
avoidinganythingthatcould
makeusfeelvulnerableto
beingbullied—whetherit’s
rationalornot—thesolution?
Intheshortterm,thiscould
meantheavoidanceofsocial
situations,work,schoolor
socialnetworking,notto
mentionhypersensitivity,
potentiallossofweightand
evenself-harmingbehaviour.
Inthelongterm,Rosssays,it
couldevenleadtoalifetime
ofdifficultieswithsocial
interaction,creatingissues
withmakingandsustaining
futurerelationships,ortoone
becomingdepressed—which
couldthenleadtoself-harm
orattemptstotakeone’s
ownlife.“Inmostcases,the
perceptionthatanindividual
hasofthemselvesdramatically
reducesandtheymayhave
persistentthoughtslike,‘I’m
worthless,I’mrubbish,and
nobodylikesme,’whichin
turncanexacerbatemanyof
thesymptomsabove,”Ross
adds.It’saviciouscircle,and
onethatishardtobreak.
TECH-HAPPYTROLLS
Sohowdidpeopleinthe21st
centurybecomesomean?
Technologyis,inlargepart,
toblame—designedtomake
ourliveseasierandmore
openlyaccessibletoothers,
thereachoftheinternetand
itsroleinoureverydaylife
meansthat,unfortunately,any
negativeinteractionscannow
chaseusanywherefromour
workplacestoourbedrooms.
Pesteringandharassmentno
longerstopsatourfrontdoor:
It’sinourhomes,creepingup
everywherefromouremail
inboxestooursocialmedia
accounts,anditcancomefrom
anywhereintheworld.“There
arefarmorewaysofbullying
nowthantherewere10or20
yearsago,”Rosssays.Aside
fromthefactthatwe’renow
moreconstantlyandeasily
accessibletoothers,thisnew
cultureofinstantgratification
meansmanypeoplearealso
becomingmoreimpatient,
whichcanleadtotraitssuch
aslowertolerance,beingmore
demandingandfeelingmore
entitledtowhatyouwant,
whenyouwantit,sometimes
aggressivelyso.It’salsosoeasy
forinformationtogoviralnow
thatthespreadofpotentially
damagingcontenthasbecome
afat,juicyappledanglingfrom
atree:Gainingnotorietyatthe
clickofabuttonissotempting
thatweoftenactbeforewe
thinkoftheconsequences,
evenifthegainscomeat
someoneelse’sexpense.“Toa
certainextent,technologyis
affectingthewayweviewour
relationshipswithbothfriends
orstrangers,”saysJohanna.
“Weseemtobelosingtouch
withface-to-faceconnections,
andthiscouldbeareasonwhy
wearebecomingdesensitised
andfindingiteasiertobe
negativeorunfriendly.”
TAKINGACTION
“Preventingcyber-bullying
completelywouldbevery
difficult,sincebullyingcan
takeonmanyformsandeach
individualexperiencesthings
indifferentways:Whatone
personconsidersbullying,
PHOTOGRAPHY:GETTYIMAGESANDSHUTTERSTOCK.
Life and Love
98 W O M E N ’ S H E A LT H M I D D L E E A S T / February 2015
Don’tbeartheburden
ofharassmentalone:
There’s noshamein
seekinghelpfrom
friendsorevena
healthprofessional

4. INSTA-TROLL
ClareWright,a29-year-oldPublicRelations
ManagerinDubai,wastargetedonher
Instagramaccount.“Someoneleftabout
20offensivecommentsondifferentphotos,
makingfunofmypicturesormyappearance.
TherewereacoupleofthingsthatIwasquite
sensitiveabout,butsomeoftheinsultsdidn’t
evenmakesense.Ididn’tactuallynoticethem
untiloneofmyfriendspostedareplytoa
meancommentsayingwhatanawfulthing
itwastosay.Igotthathorriblefeelingyou
getwhenyourfacegoeshotandyourears
gopricklyandIfeltsick.ThenIjustthought,
‘Whatthe…?’”shesays.
Thankfully,Clare’sstrongnatureand
supportnetworkhelpedherdealwiththe
matterquicklyandeffectively:“Ideletedall
thecomments—aftertakingscreengrabsof
them—andreportedthepersontoInstagram,
thenblockedthem.“Ithoughtaboutreplying
butIknewthatwaswhatheorshewanted.
Acoupleofmyfriendsaskediftheycould
replytothem,too,butIsaidno,”shesays.The
trollwashiddenbehindaprivateaccount,
anddespitewonderingwhoshemighthave
upset,Claredidn’twanttorequesttofollow
themtofindoutwhotheywere. “Ichecked
backforthenextfewweeks,buttheaccount
wasstilllive.Whentheinsultsdidn’tcontinue,
Idecidedthatitwasjustsomeprofessional
trollamusingthemselves,”sheexplains.
WhileClaresuspectsInstagramdidn’t
doanythingtoresolvethematter,talkingto
herfriendsaboutithelped:“Itmademefeel
bettertoventandhavemyfriendsassureme
thatIdidn’tdeservethecomments.AtfirstI
wasembarrassedtotellpeople,butIhadn’t
doneanythingwrong!”Interestingly,nearly
allofherfriendsassumedtheculpritmust
havebeensomeoneClareknew:“Theydidn’t
knowwhatImeantwhenIsaid[Ithoughtit
mightbe]a‘professionaltroll.’I’vereadabout
themanditjustseemedtofittheprofile.It’s
worrying,though,thatifthishappenedtoone
ofthem,theywouldassumeitwassomeone
theyknewpersonally.OnceIdecidedthatit
wasatroll,Ijustacceptedthefactthatthey
werealoserandgotonwithmylife.Iknew
therewasnopointintryingto‘uncover’them.
I’mquiteluckythatIhaveastrongsenseof
myownpersonalworth—enoughtonotlet
thecommentsgettomeandmoveon.Ican
imaginesomepeoplewouldreallytakethe
commentstoheart,andtheresultofthat
couldbedisastrous,”shesays.
anothermayconsiderjoking
orcharacter-building,”says
Ross,suggestingthattrying
tomanagebullyingmaybea
moreefficientwayofcoping.
Raisingawarenessthatitdoes
exist,inadultsaswellaskids,
wouldhelpustobebetter
atspottingit,enablingusto
takemeasurestonipitinthe
budbeforethingsgetserious.
Readinguponcyber-bullying
canalsohelpmanageyour
self-esteem,saysRoss:“[If]
youunderstandthepsyche
ofthebully,youcouldreflect
onnottakingitpersonally.
There’snormallyareason
whysomeoneisabully,andit
usuallyhasnothingtodowith
you.Whilethisdoesn’tmake
itright,youshouldfindsome
solaceinknowingthatyou’re
mostlikelybearingthebrunt
ofsomeoneelse’sinsecurities
ordifficulties,[ratherthan
yourown].”Oncewe’reaware
they’reoutthere,wealso
needtowiseup,Johannasays:
“Ifyou’regoingtospeakina
publicforum,therewillbe
somepeoplewhodisagree
withyou.Thinkbeforeyou
speakorwrite,bematureand
expectthatsome[incendiary
types]maybeoutthere,and
usetheinternetinasensible
way.”Ifwhatittakestonot
letitgettoyouisdeletingit
soyounolongerhavetosee
it,doso.Ifthingsaregetting
reallynasty,considergetting
theauthoritiesinvolved.And
ifit’scuttingatyoursense
ofself-worth,speakingto
ahealthcareprofessional
couldhelp.Rossrecommends
writingdowneasilyvisible
positiveaffirmationsthatyou
knowtobetrue:“Ifyou’re
findingthisdifficult,perhaps
youcouldaskafriendorfamily
memberto[help].”Rossalso
warnsagainstavoidingsocial
situationsthatmightmake
youfeelnervousoranxious:
“Thiscouldcontribute
tokeepingyournegative
self-beliefsalive,”hesays,
explainingthatgivinginto
thesefeelingsoffearcanonly
perpetuatewhatabullyis
tryingtoinstigate.Throwing
yourselfintoexerciseand
hobbiesthatyouknowwilllift
yourmoodwheneveryou’re
feelingbeatendownwillnot
onlyhelpkeepyourmindoff
it,itcouldalsohelpstopyou
fromsinkingintoaspiralof
negativityinwhichabully’s
attackscanbreakthrough
yourwallofconfidenceand
self-worth.Andremember:
Whateveryoudo,justdon’t
feedthetrolls.Q
February 2015 / W O M E N ’ S H E A LT H M I D D L E E A S T 99