Pleasing Personality

Wong Yew Yip
yewyip@gmail.com
One of Napoleon Hill’s 17 Principles of Success

Napoleon Hill Associates Malaysia  Version 1.0 
Designed & Developed by : Wong Yew Yip ~ 15 October 2021
Pleasing Personality
Your pleasing
personality is your
greatest asset or
liability
It embraces everything
you control - your mind,
your body, and your soul

☺ A Pleasing Personality is the composite
of all the agreeable, gratifying and likeable
qualities of any person
☺ Your personality is your trademark
☺ It reveals the kind of thinking you do, your
ethics, your integrity and the kind of life
you lead
☺ It is through your personality that you
motivate others to help you to reach your
goals
☺ Your personality is the sum of the mental,
emotional, spiritual and physical traits that
distinguish you from all others

A Pleasing
Personality is
an asset you
can’t do
without if you
wish to attain
success

Affirmation - The real
me is a magnificent,
unique being with
enormous potential and
capacity for
experiencing love for
myself and extending
love to others

1. You will begin to take more risks and lose the fear of
failure
2. You will not be as concerned about what others
think of you or your Definite Major Purpose
3. All your relationships will exhibit improvement and
become more rewarding
4. You will pursue activities that result in personal joy
and satisfaction
5. You will make a positive contribution to your
community and maybe even the world
6. You will experience peace of mind
Self-esteem is closely related to your personality - it is the sum of
your self-confidence and self-respect. If your self-esteem is
healthy you feel comfortable and worthy, resulting in the following:
Self-Esteem and Personality

To build your Self-Esteem
1. Do not compare yourself with others
2. Stop putting yourself down - allow no negative self-talk
3. Learn to accept compliments with a simple “Thank you”
4. Use positive affirmations several times each day
5. Take advantage of self-help opportunities
6. Choose your friends and associates carefully. Affiliate with positive,
supportive people
7. Make a list of your past success
8. List your positive qualities
9. Start giving more of yourself to others
10. Get involved in work and activities you enjoy and love
11. Be true to yourself
12. Begin today to take positive action

Factors of a Pleasing Personality
1. A Positive Mental Attitude
2. Flexibility of mind
3. Sincerity of Purpose
4. Promptness of Decision
5. Common Courtesy
6. Tactfulness
7. Pleasing Tone of Voice
8. Facial Expressions
9. Tolerance
10. Forthright Manner and Speech
11. Sense of Humor
12. Faith in Infinite Intelligence
13. A Keen Sense of Justice
14. Appropriate Use of Words
15. Effective Speech
16. Control of Emotions
17. Alertness of Interest
18. Versatility
19. Fondness for People
20. Control of Temper
21. Hope and Ambition
22. Temperance
23. Patience
24. Humility of Heart
25. Appropriateness of Dress
26. Effective Showmanship
27. Sportsmanship
28. Ability to Shake Hands
29. Personal Magnetism
30. Habit of Smiling when speaking

A Positive Mental Attitude
 A Positive Mental Attitude is a confident,
constructive, sure, practical and forward-moving
disposition of the mind over and against any given
set of circumstances - the right mental attitude in
any given situation
 It is composed of the positive characteristics
symbolized by such word as faith, integrity, hope,
optimism, courage, initiative, generosity,
tolerance, tact, kindness and good common
sense
 It affects the tone of your voice, the expression of
your face, the posture of your body, every thought
you think, every word you speak
 It determines the nature of every emotion you feel
1

A Positive Mental Attitude
 Everyone and everything that comes within range
of your personality is affected by your mental
attitude
 If you desire to exert a positive, wholesome
influence upon those who surround you, and
cause them to feel that you have a Pleasing
Personality, it is necessary that you maintain a
Positive Mental Attitude
 A Positive Mental Attitude is an important factor
in achieving a Pleasing Personality and it will
express itself in all the fine and noble
characteristics that will attract others to you and
win you their favorable attention and cooperation
1

Flexibility of Mind
 Flexibility of Mind is the ability to
understand the ways and points of view of
others, and to adapt yourself to the
harmonious operation with viewpoints and
ways
 This does not mean that to achieve flexibility of mind you must be
willing to change your mind with every new thought, idea or custom
that is presented to you - you would be a spineless jelly fish and would
not have a Pleasing Personality
 Flexibility of mind, the ability to understand and empathize with others,
makes possible a pleasant, successful, working relationship
 Flexibility of mind is essential in the home and business relationship,
and for successful sales professionals and leaders in business and
industry
2

Flexibility of Mind
“Flexibility” said Andrew Carnegie,
“was the one quality which gained
for Charles M. Schwab the
reputation of being one of America’s
greatest sales professionals. He
could get down to the ground and
play with a group of children, then
go his office and make decisions
involving millions of dollars”
2

Sincerity of Purpose
 Sincerity of Purpose is one trait of a Pleasing
Personality for which a satisfactory substitute
has never been found - it reaches deeper into
your essence than most qualities of personality
 An insincere person announces this weakness in the tone of the voice,
the expression on the face, the nature and trend of conversations,
choice of intimate associates and in the type of services rendered - even
though this person is a skilled actor with great ability to camouflage
 Flexibility of mind is essential in the home and business relationship,
and for successful sales professionals and leaders in business and
industry
 Sincerity is the attribute through which you gain the confidence of others
and is an essential requirement in all satisfactory relationships
 The yes-person is an object of contempt the world over mainly because
everyone recognizes this form of insincerity
3

Sincerity of Purpose
1. Be sincere with yourself
2. Be sincere with your family
3. Be sincere with your associates
4. Be sincere with your friends and
associates
5. Be sincere with the Giver of all
good gifts
Sincerity is the trait of sound character and Pleasing
Personality that reflects itself so visibly that none
can fail to observe. This principle requires you to:
Your sincerity will pay of in ways too numerous to mention. But the greatest of
these will be the feeling of self-reliance you will experience and faith in yourself
3

Promptness of Decision
 You will notice that those who cannot make up
their minds are neither popular nor successful
 Promptness of decision develops as a result of a
confident, constructive, sure and progressive
Positive Mental Attitude
 We live in a country where individual achievement is possible on a grand
scale because of the great abundance of opportunities in every calling
 But, opportunity does not wait for the person who has difficulty making a
decision
 When you have both the vision to recognize opportunity and the
promptness of decision necessary to embrace, you will get ahead
 Promptness of decision is an important factor in the attainment of a
Pleasing Personality, and it is a very prominent trait in all successful
people. It is a habit that you can acquire through Self-discipline
4

Common Courtesy
 Common courtesy is the cheapest, yet most
profitable, of all essential traits of a Pleasing
Personality - this trait is absolutely free!
 All it costs is a Positive Mental Attitude, sincerity
of purpose, consideration for the rights and
feelings of others, and the willingness to share
your blessings with others
 Courtesy is the habit of respecting other people’s rights and feelings
under all circumstances, going out of your way to help a less fortunate
person whenever possible, rendering useful service without expectation
of direct reward, controlling selfishness, greed, envy and hatred
 Courtesy is a reflection of the spirit of fellowship without which no one
may have dependable friends
 It often serves as an irresistible force with which you may disarm
enemies and antagonists
5

Tactfulness
 This is so closely related to common
courtesy that one cannot be separated
from the other
 Tactfulness consists of doing and
saying the right things at the right time
 Where courtesy and good common
sense are applied, tactfulness will
invariably follow
 Tactfulness exhibits itself in all facets of
everyday living
 If you wish to develop and maintain a
Pleasing Personality, avoid the more
common errors in tactfulness
6

Common Errors in Tactfulness
1. Careless in tone of your voice
2. Interrupting the speech of others
3. Speaking out of turn
4. Overworking the pronoun “I”
5. Asking impertinent questions to impress
6. Injecting intimately personal subjects into conversation
7. Going where you have not been invited
8. Being boastful
9. Dressing inappropriately
10. Making personal calls at inconvenient hours
11. Keeping people on telephone with needless conversation
12. Volunteering opinions when not requested
13. Challenging soundness of opinions
14. Arrogantly declining requests from others
15. Speaking disparagingly of other people
16. Correcting subordinates in front of others
17. Complaining when requests are refused
18. Asking favors from friends or acquaintances
19. Using profane and offensive language
20. Expressing your dislikes too freely
21. Talking about misfortunes in complaining manner
22. Criticizing someone’s religious beliefs
23. Over-familiarity in any human relationship
24. Indulging in malicious gossip
25. Minimizing another person’s achievements
26. Exaggerating facts
27. Unjustified flattery
6

Pleasing Tone of Voice
 You will express your personality through the
spoken word more often than in any other way
 Your voice is more indicative of your true
feeling than the words you use
 Control the tone of your voice to be pleasing to the listener and
colored and modified to convey the desired meaning
 An uncontrolled tone of voice may cause the listener to suspect
you of insincerity even when the words used are sincerely meant
 When you have a Pleasing Personality you will know how to
convey emotions by modifying your voice - express fear, anger,
curiosity, contempt, doubt, affection, courage, sincerity, anxiety
and a variety of other emotions by the mere control of your voice
7

Facial Expressions
 The expression on your face will reveal
your real character
 Everyone, consciously or unconsciously,
tries to discern what is going on in the mind
of others by their facial expressions
 Each expression conveys the mental attitude of its wearer with
unerring accuracy - just try smiling when you are angry
 Your smile will change the mental attitude of those with whom
you come in contact, perhaps one of the greatest benefits of the
habit of smiling when you speak
 People who smile often disarm their foes without saying a word
and defeat the cruelest of antagonist, for it is difficult to argue with
people who smile when they speak
8

Tolerance
 Tolerance is the disposition to be patient and fair
toward those whose opinions, practices and beliefs
differ from your own - the maintenance of an open
mind
 Tolerant people keep their minds open to receive new
and different facts and knowledge on all subjects
 Intolerant people have fixed opinions on almost everything and generally
express their opinions freely and emphatically - they infer that anyone
who disagrees with them must be wrong
 Intolerance definitely limits your privilege of appropriating and using the
knowledge and experience of others - it repels and make enemies of
those who would otherwise be your friends
 It stops the growth of your mind, discourages development of the faculty
of your imagination and prohibits accuracy in your thinking and reasoning
9

Forthright Manner and Speech
 Everyone mistrusts people who resort to
subterfuge and do not deal frankly and openly
in their relationships with others
 People of sound character and a Pleasing
Personality always have the courage to deal
directly and openly with others - perfectly
forthright in manner and speech
 Forthright in manner and speech are an undeniable indication of
sincerity, the one trait in a Pleasing Personality for which no
substitute has been found
 When you employ such frankness un manner and speech you
will inspire confidence in others and will thereby gain the benefits
of many fine, dependable relationships
10

Sense of Humor
 “Laugh and the whole world laughs with you;
weep and you weep alone” - an old adage the
truth of which cannot be contested
 It pays rich dividends to develop a keen sense of
humor - helps you to become flexible, to relax
and become warm and human, that will attract
many friends to you
 A keen sense of humor will keep you from taking yourself too seriously
- some escape from routine of daily occupation and serve as a tonic for
maintenance of sound physical health
 It is also an insurance against intolerance - many intolerant people
wear a sober expression on their faces
 Humor has its own special brand of chemistry, which when properly
mixed with sincerity, courtesy, tact and tolerance, will develop a
11

Faith in Infinite Intelligence
 “The intangible power of faith is the
essence of every great individual
achievement
 Faith in Infinite Intelligence inspires faith
in other human beings as well -
confidence begets confidence
 When you have faith in Infinite Intelligence, faith in yourself and
faith in others, you will inspire others to have faith in you
 People of faith will be liked and receive the cheerful cooperation
of others
 Faith is the master gate through which you access the great
universal power of thought that operates through the brain
12

A Keen Sense of Justice
 Justice refers to intentional honesty and is
the result of a constructive, wholesome
Positive Mental Attitude - moral justice not
legal justice
 Justice cannot be altered for the sake of
expediency, nor can it be stretched to fit any
circumstance or personal interest
 Justice that contributes to a Pleasing Personality is an absolute
standard
 It must be rigidly adhered to and it will motivate you to do what is
right because it is right, not for any immediate advantage or hope
of reward
 It becomes a priceless asset in almost every relationship,
banishes greed, envy, hatred and selfishness
13

A Keen Sense of Justice
The benefits of a keen sense of justice
1. It establishes a sound basis for confidence
2. It develops a sound and dependable character
3. It not only attracts people but also offers opportunities for
personal gain with your occupation
4. It provides you with a feeling of self-reliance and self-respect
5. It gives you a clear conscience
6. It prepares your mind for faith
7. It inspires you to move toward a Definite Major Purpose with
greater Personal Initiative
13

Appropriate Use of Words
 Choose the right words for almost every
situation - you can attract or repel others
 There is no excuse for the careless use of
words that will offend the sensibilities of
others
 The use of profanity at any time and under any circumstance is
inexcusable - you profane the name of the Creator who endowed
you with the ability to use words
 The appropriate use of words is a sign of education and culture
 When you use words appropriately, together with a pleasing tone
of voice and pleasant facial expressions, you gain the attention,
respect, confidence and approval of others
14

Effective Speech
 Effective speech requires the appropriate
use of words, a pleasing and motivating
tone of voice, dynamic delivery and
pleasing facial expressions
 People who cannot speak with force and conviction, without fear or
embarrassment, on any subject of their choice, are under a great
handicap so far as the personality is concerned
 History reveals that the trend of civilization has been influenced by those
who could dramatize an idea through spoken words
 Outstanding examples of those who have risen to great heights of
personal achievement because of their ability to sell themselves and
ideas through effective speech are George Washington, Abraham
Lincoln, Franklin Roosevelt, Martin Luther King and John F. Kennedy
 Know what you wish to say; say it with all the emotional feelings at your
command, then sit down
15

Control of Emotions
Someone said the world is ruled by
emotions - of this we cannot be sure
but we do know that most individuals
are ruled by their emotions
 We all do that which we want to do, whether it be in accord with
the dictates of reason or not
 In the Definite Major Purpose principle was a list of the most
consequential positive and negative emotions which must be
brought under control if you are to achieve a Pleasing
Personality
 Emotions under control is an exceptional power which can be
attained through the exercise of reason and the application of
Self-discipline
16

Alertness of Interest
 If you want others to be interested in you, you
must exhibit an alert and active interest in them
 Indifference toward other people and their
interests does not make you popular or
contribute to a Pleasing Personality
 Alertness of interest should begin with the ability to take a keen
interest in your own Definite Major Purpose in life
 An alert mind will see and grasp opportunity whenever and
wherever it presents itself but a dull and indifferent mind will
stumble over opportunity without even recognizing it
 The alert mind will usually get that which it seeks, while
indifference will force you to accept whatever life offers
17

Versatility
 People who lack a general interest and understanding of the
world are seldom interesting or attractive - versatility in
people and things is necessary to have a Pleasing
Personality
 People who know little of anything outside their job and
personal affairs never will become pleasing to others unless
they change their habits
 People who are familiar with only one subject are, of necessity, compelled
to confine themselves to that subject when they converse with others
 Popular people are versatile - they have at least a surface knowledge of
many subjects, interested in other people and their ideas, and they go out
of their way to express that interest where it will inspire appropriate
reaction to their own benefit
 Versatility gives you the capacity to understand people and produces a
hunger to be a life-long learner for personal growth throughout your life
18

Fondness for People
 We are attracted to the person who naturally likes
people just as definitely as we resent those who
have a dislike for people
 The law of retribution is inflexible - it operates so
that people are judged and dealt with not just for
their deeds, but for their dominating mental attitude
through which they express their likes and dislikes
 It is inevitable that people who dislike others will be disliked, and
those who naturally like people will be liked
 Through the principle of telepathy, every mind communicates with
other minds within its range
 If you wish to develop a Pleasing Personality you must constantly
control not only your words and deeds, but your thoughts
19

Control of Temper
 Temper is the heat of mind or passion shown
in outburst of anger, or temper is the emotion
of anger allowed free rein
 Intense emotion is fundamental to all
achievement but if you let your temper fly in all
directions, you will surely find it landing where
it will do you great injury on the rebound
 Perhaps the greatest injury an uncontrolled temper may do is that
which often results from uncontrolled speech - an uncontrolled
temper and tongue repel rather than attract
 Remember your tongue and control your temper, lest you release
words that come back to you as a boomerang and destroy your
chances of beneficial relationships with other people
20

Hope and Ambition
 People without ambition and the hope of
achieving it are harmless - no one cares about
people who show by their deeds, or lack of
deeds, that they have abandoned hope of
getting ahead in the world
 Hope and ambition give you life and fire, inspire you to perspire in the
face of defeat and privation until you have achieved your goals
 People will seek your company if you demonstrate hope and ambition -
they expect a bit of the fire that inspires you to rub off onto them
 People who express defeatism in the tone of their voice, the expression
on their face and the aimlessness of their action, make poor associates
for those who move to a Definite Major Purpose
 The world may forgive people for most of their mistakes, provided they
have high aims and hope of achievement, but will not forgive a person for
failure through indifference and hopelessness
21

Temperance
 Temperance is the practice of moderation and
self-restraint in all things, and is absolutely
imperative in the development of a Pleasing
Personality
 People who lack the necessary Self-
discipline to manage their personal habits
are never attractive to others - habits of
eating, drinking and sexual relationships
 Temperance in all things and over-indulgence in none should be
your motto in seeking to develop an attractive personality
 People who have enough personal pride to control their intimately
personal habits will most likely be a success in everything they
undertake
22

Patience
 Patience may be defined as calm and
uncomplaining endurance under pain or
provocation - it is a quiet perseverance
 Patience is necessary, in this fast-moving,
high-speed world, to avoid the destructive
effects of friction in your relationships
 Impatience is a visible sign of lack of Self-discipline, often from
overwork, burnout and lack of proper rest, that exhibits itself in a
grouchy, irritable, disagreeable attitude - it rarely inspires support or
sympathy from anyone
 If you maintain a calm, confident, constructive and wholesome
mental attitude, you will not find it difficult to develop patience - by
controlling your personal habits, getting sufficient rest and mixing
work and relaxation in proper proportion
23

3
Humility of Heart
Humility of heart assures the
absence of arrogance, greed, vanity
and egotism
Humility of heart is the outgrowth of
the understanding of your
relationship to the Creator
It is the recognition of the fact that all the material blessings of
life are the gifts from the Creator for the common good of all
the creation
No matter how successful you are, you will be humble if you
are on good terms with your conscience and in harmony with
the Creator
24

Appropriateness of Dress
 Good taste in clothing recognizes color combinations,
design of style and harmony with one’s personality,
physical build, size and occupation
 The person whose taste in clothing prompts
overdressing will not be attractive to others, but may
arouse opposition and resentment
 The best person is the one whose clothes and accessories are well
chosen so that one does not attract undue attention because of his or her
adornment
 It may not be true that clothes make the woman or man but one cannot
deny that clothes go a long way toward giving each of us a favorable
introduction
 Appropriateness of dress gives one a feeling of self-reliance and helps to
overcome self-consciousness
25

Effective Showmanship
 Effective showmanship consists in a combination of
other traits, such as facial expression, voice control,
appropriate dress, proper choice of words, mastery of
emotions, courtesy, effective speech, versatility,
Positive Mental Attitude, sense of humor, alertness
of interest in other people, tactfulness
 Constructive, effective showmanship has no reference to the common
habit of “wise-cracking” which often proves not to be so wise
 Nor does it refer to the habit of clowning or gossiping, often resorted to as
a means of attracting attention
 Effective showmanship is the ability to dramatize circumstances and
situations without offense to others
 It is a trait that often pays big dividends provided it is not overworked or
applied at the wrong time and place
26

Sportsmanship
 People who can win without boasting and lose
without complaining are sure to be popular -
known as “good sports”
 Educators know that this habit, learned in sports,
becomes a part of your character and is of great
benefit in all other activities and relationships in
life
 Poor sportsmanship usually is the result of greed, fear, selfishness
or out-and-out dishonesty - it never makes you popular nor
contributes to your Pleasing Personality
 Good sportsmanship is an important trait of a Pleasing Personality
because it inspires the friendly cooperation of others and connotes
sound character
27

Ability to Shake Hands
 Most people would not think of the habit of
shaking hands as having anything to do
with a Pleasing Personality but it has
 Some people when being introduced or greeting others, perfunctorily do
through the ceremony of shaking hands - they do not recognize that signs
of indifference or carelessness may be damaging to a relationship
 A proper handshake conveys animation, Enthusiasm and a spirit of
sincere friendship
 Judges of character learn a great deal about people from the manner in
which they shake hands - it generally follows that a cold, emotionless
handshake denotes a cold, emotionless personality
 To shake hands properly, coordinate your handshake with words of
greeting, releasing the other person’s hand when completing the spoken
greeting
28

Personal Magnetism
 The term personal magnetism is a polite way of
describing sexual energy or emotion - something
the Creator has endowed us all
 It can and should be controlled and transmuted into
any desired form of human endeavor - a potential
assets of priceless value
 Sex emotion is the power behind all Creative Vision - means by which all
living species are perpetuated and it inspires the use of imagination,
Enthusiasm and Personal Initiative
 It is significant that successful people who make their living through some
form of self-expression have acquired the art of transmutation of sex
energy by diverting it into their endeavors
 Do not be concerned if you have been blessed with a great abundance of
sex energy but be ashamed if you fail to give this emotion its proper place
29

Habit of Smiling when speaking
 If the conversation is funny for both of you, or if you’re in a funny
situation, it’s a good time to smile
 Smiling before saying goodbye signals that you like the person,
that you have enjoyed your conversation, and it will reassure the
other person that you’re up for meeting again
30
A natural smile shows that you are happy
to meet, that you have nothing to hide,
and that you enjoy the moment
Smiling back when someone smiles at
you can make them feel more secure in
the conversation, and as a result, they
will enjoy it more

Remember before you speak that every
word you speak advertises your wisdom
or your ignorance
Habit of Smiling when speaking
30

Benefits of a Pleasing Personality
1. A Pleasing Personality attracts the friendly cooperation of others, and
thus prepares the way for Master Mind Alliances
2. It insures the maintenance of a Positive Mental Attitude that is a
prerequisite for success in all constructive human endeavor
3. It qualifies you with the most important fundamental of leadership in any
calling or profession
4. It establishes harmony within your mind, which is the first requirement
for harmony in relationship with others
5. It is an essential asset for the accumulation of material riches
6. It is the builder of self-reliance
7. It helps convert defeat to victory
8. It increases the space you may occupy in the hearts of others, and
discourages friction in all your human relationships

Summary
1. Your personality is the total of the mental, spiritual and physical traits
that distinguish you from all others
2. It is a factor that determines whether you are liked or disliked by others
3. It is the medium by which you will negotiate your way through life
4. It will determine to a large extent, your ability to associate and
cooperate with others with a minimum of friction and opposition
5. The financial value of a Pleasing Personality maybe measured by
observing that those who have negative, disagreeable personalities
seldom found in positions of responsibility
6. They are not found in the higher income brackets
7. People with Pleasing Personality have little difficulty selling
themselves in all their relationships

SELF-INVENTORY OF MY PLEASING PERSONALITY NAME :
No.
How would I rate my Pleasing
Personality factors?
( Rate 1 to 10; 1 = Very Bad, 10 = Excellent)
Rating
(1 -10)
How would I improve? When?
1. A Positive Mental Attitude
2. Flexibility of mind
3. Sincerity of Purpose
4. Promptness of Decision
5. Common Courtesy
6. Tactfulness
7. Pleasing Tone of Voice
8. Facial Expressions
9. Tolerance
10. Forthright Manner and Speech

No.
Rating
(1 -10)
11. Sense of Humor
12. Faith in Infinite Intelligence
13. A Keen Sense of Justice
14. Appropriate Use of Words
15. Effective Speech
16. Control of Emotions
17. Alertness of Interest
18. Versatility
19. Fondness for People
20. Control of Temper

No.
Rating
(1 -10)
21. Hope and Ambition
22. Temperance
23. Patience
24. Humility of Heart
25. Appropriateness of Dress
26. Effective Showmanship
27. Sportsmanship
28. Ability to Shake Hands
29. Personal Magnetism
30 Habit of Smiling when speaking
My Total Score My overall rating (Total Score ÷ 300)

Thank You
Contact :
yewyip@gmail.com
for PowerPoint file

Pleasing Personality

Recommended

Recommended

More Related Content

What's hot

What's hot (20)

Similar to Pleasing Personality

Similar to Pleasing Personality (20)

More from Wong Yew Yip

More from Wong Yew Yip (20)

Recently uploaded

Recently uploaded (20)

Pleasing Personality