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Hi.
@clevergirl
Accepting the Truth at Work: 3 Practical Tools
Accepting the Truth at Work: 3 Practical Tools
WOMAN FACING DOWN RIOT POLICE
KIDS BEHIND CHAIN LINK FENCES
HURRICAINES< FIRES< CLIMATE DENIERS
Accepting the Truth at Work: 3 Practical Tools
WOMAN FACING DOWN RIOT POLICE
KIDS BEHIND CHAIN LINK FENCES
HURRICAINES< FIRES< CLIMATE DENIERS
These days, many
Americans are reflecting on
what’s true.
And what we need to do to get
ourselves out of this predicament.
@clevergirl
Accepting the Truth at Work: 3 Practical Tools
Most very large companies have one
thing in common with America:
They’re big, and strong, and think that
because they have been dominant for a long
time, that they’re probably doing alright.
@clevergirl
Large corporations struggle to grow
Walmart <1%
Ford <0%
Coca Cola <0%
Dow Chemical <0%
@clevergirl
How Companies Can
Create Like Entrepreneurs, Invest
Like VC’s, and Install a Permanent
Operating System for Growth
EW
T
GDavid Kidder
Christina Wallace
“How companies can create
like entrepreneurs, invest
like VCs, and install a
permanent operating
system for growth.”
@clevergirl
Today we’re about product leadership.
And this year, and all of my
customers are struggling to deal with truth.
So it’s in this frame of that I’ve been
examining my tool kit.
@clevergirl
J A N I C E F R A S E R
Chief Product Officer
3 TOOLS
FOR UNCOVERING,
ACCEPTING, and ACTING
ON WHAT IS TRUE.
…so that we can be more effective at work
@clevergirl
1. The path out of hell leads through misery.
2. Business decisions are often made illogically.
3. One does not get buy in during a meeting.
3 PROVOCATIVE BUT TRUE STATEMENTS
@clevergirl
“The path out of hell
leads through misery.”
INCONVENIENT TRUTH or PESSIMISTIC LIE
@clevergirl
Radical
Acceptance
MARSHA LINEHAN
Psychology Researcher
University Washington
working on it since 1968
@clevergirl
Truth with care,
For the benefit of another.
@clevergirl
Radical Acceptance
Truth with care, for the benefit of yourself.
Tool
#1
@clevergirl
What kind of truths do we need
to accept at work?
You did not get a raise
Customers don’t use our product
The roadmap didn’t get approved
That person is a jerk, even though his
work is good
This project is a mess
You disagree with that decision
The way that we’ve been doing things
isn’t working
The new competitor is winning
The stakeholder is not cooperative
Someone thinks you’re to blame
Sales are down
Recession is inevitable
You have responsibility but not authority
There is too much work for the amount of
time and resources
@clevergirl
• How often do you complain about work?
• How often do you leave work exhausted?
• When was the last time you were angry about
something that happened at work?
Wouldn’t it be good to get some relief from that?
@clevergirl
Take a moment to consider a recent
business decision that was disappointing.
@clevergirl
Consider the impact of that decision.
Who were all the people negatively affected by it?
Did the decision-makers consider the right things?
What would have been a better call?
Who was consulted?
@clevergirl
Notice how your body feels right now
Is your heart beating faster?
Shallow breath?
Lump in your throat? Tight chest?
Sweaty palms? Face hot?
If yes, you’re still not at peace with the facts.
@clevergirl
All of those thoughts and
sensations get in the way of
being effective at work.
@clevergirl
We get stuck in our belief that the current situation
Should Not be the way that it is.
That creates a mental dissonance – it’s true, but it
shouldn’t be true.
“Radical Acceptance is when you stop
fighting reality, stop throwing tantrums
because reality is not the way you want it.”
—Marsha Linehan
@clevergirl
Typically, we work around it,
ignore it. Chin up. Persevere.
@clevergirl
Radical Acceptance Tool:
6 Question Retro
By yourself, or with a trusted partner/advisor, answer these questions
simply and factually. This is about the Past and the Present.
Write down your answers. Spend an hour.
1. What is the unsettling situation?
2. How did this situation occur?
3. What effect did it have on you (professional, emotional, physical)?
4. How did you contribute to the situation?
5. How did those around you contribute to the situation?
6. What did you have control over in the situation?
@clevergirl
When you accept reality, it stops controlling your thoughts and
emotions, so that you can be more effective.
@clevergirl
3 Paths Forward,
once you get unstuck
1. Solve the problem.
2. Feel better about the problem.
3. Tolerate the problem.
@clevergirl
BY ME
FOR ME
BY ME FOR
OTHERS
UNVARNISHED
TRUTH
PREVARICATION
RADICAL
CANDOR
RADICAL
ACCEPTANCE
FRUSTRATED
BLINDNESS
TOXIC
NICENESS
@clevergirl
Radical Acceptance
All the way. Complete. It is accepting in your mind,
your heart, and your body.
@clevergirl
Why accept reality?
1. Rejecting reality doesn’t change it.
2. Changing reality requires that you first accept it.
3. Acceptance can lead to pain.
4. Pain can’t be avoided. (Rejecting reality turns pain into suffering.)
5. Accepting reality usually leads to deep calm.
“The path out of hell is through misery.”
@clevergirl
“It isn't suffering that leads to
hopelessness. It's suffering
you think you can't control.”
Angela Duckworth
Grit, 2016
@clevergirl
2. Business decisions are often made illogically.
PROBLEM
@clevergirl
“Most men, including those at ease with
problems of the greatest complexity, can
seldom accept even the simplest and
most obvious truth if it be such as would
oblige them to admit the falsity of
conclusions which they have delighted in
explaining to colleagues, which they
have proudly taught to others, and which
they have woven, thread by thread, into
the fabric of their lives.”
Leo Tolstoy
What is Art
1897
@clevergirl
Any decision should involve at least
3 people:
The who can say Yes
The who has to live with the outcome
The who has the subject matter expertise
@clevergirl
Shout out to Cindy Alvarez
MTP 8/18 San Francisco
@clevergirl
Clusters of Cognitive Biases Affect Decision-Making
RESIST WHAT’S NEW
Ambiguity effect
Conservatism Bias
Declinism
Gambler’s Fallacy
Sunk Cost
Endowment Effect
Zero-Risk Bias
PRESENTATION
ALTERS BELIEF
Anchoring Bias
Recency Bias
Framing
Distinction Bias
Illusory Correlation
@clevergirl
I AM RIGHT, AND WHAT
I SEE MUST BE RIGHT
Blind-Spot Bias
Overconfidence
Clustering Illusion
Salience
Survivorship Bias
Availability
Selective Perception
Confirmation Bias
Belief Bias
Choice Supportive
Backfire effect
Placebo Effect
RESIST WHAT’S OLD
Pro-Innovation Bias
Optimism
INFORMATION
RECEPTIVITY
Ostrich effect
Information Bias
Bizarreness effect
SOCIAL
Bandwagon/Groupthink
Stereotyping
Shared Information Bias
Zero-Sum Bias
Loss Aversion
We want them to make a fact-based decision.
But as Tolstoy says, those are biased.
@clevergirl
We know a lot about how bias works, but how has
that knowledge changed our behavior?
@clevergirl
Monthly Bias Salon
When approaching a decision or challenge, take an hour to
think about the biases that may come into play and make an
explicit plan for de-fanging them.
1. Set aside an hour
2. Bring a colleague or two
3. What is a decision that will be made?
4. Who will be involved?
5. What are 3-4 likely biases at play?
6. How can you mitigate?
7. Repeat monthly until you’re good at it.
Tool
#2
@clevergirl
THIS MONTH’S DECISION: What Metrics to track?
@clevergirl
RESIST WHAT’S NEW
Ambiguity effect
Conservatism Bias
Declinism
Gambler’s Fallacy
Sunk Cost
Endowment Effect
Zero-Risk Bias
PRESENTATION
ALTERS BELIEF
Anchoring Bias
Recency Bias
Framing
Distinction Bias
Illusory Correlation
I AM RIGHT, AND WHAT
I SEE MUST BE RIGHT
Blind-Spot Bias
Overconfidence
Clustering Illusion
Salience
Survivorship Bias
Availability
Selective Perception
Confirmation Bias
Belief Bias
Choice Supportive
Backfire effect
Placebo Effect
RESIST WHAT’S OLD
Pro-Innovation Bias
Optimism
INFORMATION
RECEPTIVITY
Ostrich effect
Information Bias
Bizarreness effect
SOCIAL
Bandwagon/Groupthink
Stereotyping
Shared Information Bias
Zero-Sum Bias
Loss Aversion
THIS MONTH: What metrics should we track
Information Bias
What it sounds like: “Look at all the metrics I can track.”
Explicit Strategy: Work back from your definition of business or customer value.
Availability Bias
What it sounds like: “We measure “value created” with the metric SLOC. It stands for Source Lines of
Code.”
Explicit Strategy: Start with definition of business value, and let that guide what we measure.
Confirmation Bias
What it sounds like: “I never liked that idea, and see, this piece of data proves it’s not working.”
Explicit Strategy: Only measure the things that are revealing..
@clevergirl
3. One does not get buy in during a meeting.
OBVIOUS BUT OVERLOOKED
@clevergirl
“A sense of willing participation in
enthusiastic followers.”
Dan Gregory
The Impossible Institute, 2016
A DEFINITION OF BUY-IN
@clevergirl
WHAT I HATE ABOUT “BUY-IN”
1. Nobody knows what it is.
2. Everybody thinks they have it.
3. Once we’ve got it, we forget about keeping it.
4. It disappears when the wind changes.
5. Dammit.
@clevergirl
The U-BAD Model
For diagnosing Buy In
UNDERSTANDING
BELIEF
ADVOCACY
DECISION
@clevergirl – cc
You can have belief without
understanding…and that’s cool…until
it’s not.
UNDERSTANDING
BELIEF
@clevergirl
A decision without understanding or
belief…is vulnerable.
UNDERSTANDING
BELIEF
ADVOCACY
DECISION
@clevergirl
The U-BAD Model
For diagnosing Buy In
UNDERSTANDING
BELIEF
ADVOCACY
DECISION
Do they
believe in it?
Have you seen
them speaking
accurately,
effectively, and
supportively about
it?
Do they
understand
it?
Are they making
decisions in
support of it?
@clevergirl
The U-BAD Model
For diagnosing Buy In
• How do I know I have their support?
• Is it fragile or durable?
• What next actions might I take to shore up that
support it?
@clevergirl
J A N I C E F R A S E R
Chief Product Officer
3 TOOLS
FOR UNCOVERING,
ACCEPTING, and
ACTING ON WHAT IS
TRUE.
…so that we can be more effective at
work
• Radical Acceptance (Retro)
• Cognitive Bias Salon (Monthly)
• UBAD (buy-in diagnostic)
@clevergirl
“Long is the way and hard, that out of Hell leads up to light.”
John Milton
Paradise Lost, 1667
So, to close,
I want to thank you, UK,
for sharing John Oliver
with us.
There’s nothing like a
British sense of humor to
help us laugh at the truth.
@clevergirl

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Accepting the Truth at Work: 3 Practical Tools

  • 1. Hi.
  • 5. WOMAN FACING DOWN RIOT POLICE KIDS BEHIND CHAIN LINK FENCES HURRICAINES< FIRES< CLIMATE DENIERS
  • 7. WOMAN FACING DOWN RIOT POLICE KIDS BEHIND CHAIN LINK FENCES HURRICAINES< FIRES< CLIMATE DENIERS
  • 8. These days, many Americans are reflecting on what’s true. And what we need to do to get ourselves out of this predicament. @clevergirl
  • 10. Most very large companies have one thing in common with America: They’re big, and strong, and think that because they have been dominant for a long time, that they’re probably doing alright. @clevergirl
  • 11. Large corporations struggle to grow Walmart <1% Ford <0% Coca Cola <0% Dow Chemical <0% @clevergirl
  • 12. How Companies Can Create Like Entrepreneurs, Invest Like VC’s, and Install a Permanent Operating System for Growth EW T GDavid Kidder Christina Wallace “How companies can create like entrepreneurs, invest like VCs, and install a permanent operating system for growth.” @clevergirl
  • 13. Today we’re about product leadership. And this year, and all of my customers are struggling to deal with truth. So it’s in this frame of that I’ve been examining my tool kit. @clevergirl
  • 14. J A N I C E F R A S E R Chief Product Officer 3 TOOLS FOR UNCOVERING, ACCEPTING, and ACTING ON WHAT IS TRUE. …so that we can be more effective at work @clevergirl
  • 15. 1. The path out of hell leads through misery. 2. Business decisions are often made illogically. 3. One does not get buy in during a meeting. 3 PROVOCATIVE BUT TRUE STATEMENTS @clevergirl
  • 16. “The path out of hell leads through misery.” INCONVENIENT TRUTH or PESSIMISTIC LIE @clevergirl
  • 17. Radical Acceptance MARSHA LINEHAN Psychology Researcher University Washington working on it since 1968 @clevergirl
  • 18. Truth with care, For the benefit of another. @clevergirl
  • 19. Radical Acceptance Truth with care, for the benefit of yourself. Tool #1 @clevergirl
  • 20. What kind of truths do we need to accept at work? You did not get a raise Customers don’t use our product The roadmap didn’t get approved That person is a jerk, even though his work is good This project is a mess You disagree with that decision The way that we’ve been doing things isn’t working The new competitor is winning The stakeholder is not cooperative Someone thinks you’re to blame Sales are down Recession is inevitable You have responsibility but not authority There is too much work for the amount of time and resources @clevergirl
  • 21. • How often do you complain about work? • How often do you leave work exhausted? • When was the last time you were angry about something that happened at work? Wouldn’t it be good to get some relief from that? @clevergirl
  • 22. Take a moment to consider a recent business decision that was disappointing. @clevergirl
  • 23. Consider the impact of that decision. Who were all the people negatively affected by it? Did the decision-makers consider the right things? What would have been a better call? Who was consulted? @clevergirl
  • 24. Notice how your body feels right now Is your heart beating faster? Shallow breath? Lump in your throat? Tight chest? Sweaty palms? Face hot? If yes, you’re still not at peace with the facts. @clevergirl
  • 25. All of those thoughts and sensations get in the way of being effective at work. @clevergirl
  • 26. We get stuck in our belief that the current situation Should Not be the way that it is. That creates a mental dissonance – it’s true, but it shouldn’t be true. “Radical Acceptance is when you stop fighting reality, stop throwing tantrums because reality is not the way you want it.” —Marsha Linehan @clevergirl
  • 27. Typically, we work around it, ignore it. Chin up. Persevere. @clevergirl
  • 28. Radical Acceptance Tool: 6 Question Retro By yourself, or with a trusted partner/advisor, answer these questions simply and factually. This is about the Past and the Present. Write down your answers. Spend an hour. 1. What is the unsettling situation? 2. How did this situation occur? 3. What effect did it have on you (professional, emotional, physical)? 4. How did you contribute to the situation? 5. How did those around you contribute to the situation? 6. What did you have control over in the situation? @clevergirl
  • 29. When you accept reality, it stops controlling your thoughts and emotions, so that you can be more effective. @clevergirl
  • 30. 3 Paths Forward, once you get unstuck 1. Solve the problem. 2. Feel better about the problem. 3. Tolerate the problem. @clevergirl
  • 31. BY ME FOR ME BY ME FOR OTHERS UNVARNISHED TRUTH PREVARICATION RADICAL CANDOR RADICAL ACCEPTANCE FRUSTRATED BLINDNESS TOXIC NICENESS @clevergirl
  • 32. Radical Acceptance All the way. Complete. It is accepting in your mind, your heart, and your body. @clevergirl
  • 33. Why accept reality? 1. Rejecting reality doesn’t change it. 2. Changing reality requires that you first accept it. 3. Acceptance can lead to pain. 4. Pain can’t be avoided. (Rejecting reality turns pain into suffering.) 5. Accepting reality usually leads to deep calm. “The path out of hell is through misery.” @clevergirl
  • 34. “It isn't suffering that leads to hopelessness. It's suffering you think you can't control.” Angela Duckworth Grit, 2016 @clevergirl
  • 35. 2. Business decisions are often made illogically. PROBLEM @clevergirl
  • 36. “Most men, including those at ease with problems of the greatest complexity, can seldom accept even the simplest and most obvious truth if it be such as would oblige them to admit the falsity of conclusions which they have delighted in explaining to colleagues, which they have proudly taught to others, and which they have woven, thread by thread, into the fabric of their lives.” Leo Tolstoy What is Art 1897 @clevergirl
  • 37. Any decision should involve at least 3 people: The who can say Yes The who has to live with the outcome The who has the subject matter expertise @clevergirl
  • 38. Shout out to Cindy Alvarez MTP 8/18 San Francisco @clevergirl
  • 39. Clusters of Cognitive Biases Affect Decision-Making RESIST WHAT’S NEW Ambiguity effect Conservatism Bias Declinism Gambler’s Fallacy Sunk Cost Endowment Effect Zero-Risk Bias PRESENTATION ALTERS BELIEF Anchoring Bias Recency Bias Framing Distinction Bias Illusory Correlation @clevergirl I AM RIGHT, AND WHAT I SEE MUST BE RIGHT Blind-Spot Bias Overconfidence Clustering Illusion Salience Survivorship Bias Availability Selective Perception Confirmation Bias Belief Bias Choice Supportive Backfire effect Placebo Effect RESIST WHAT’S OLD Pro-Innovation Bias Optimism INFORMATION RECEPTIVITY Ostrich effect Information Bias Bizarreness effect SOCIAL Bandwagon/Groupthink Stereotyping Shared Information Bias Zero-Sum Bias Loss Aversion
  • 40. We want them to make a fact-based decision. But as Tolstoy says, those are biased. @clevergirl
  • 41. We know a lot about how bias works, but how has that knowledge changed our behavior? @clevergirl
  • 42. Monthly Bias Salon When approaching a decision or challenge, take an hour to think about the biases that may come into play and make an explicit plan for de-fanging them. 1. Set aside an hour 2. Bring a colleague or two 3. What is a decision that will be made? 4. Who will be involved? 5. What are 3-4 likely biases at play? 6. How can you mitigate? 7. Repeat monthly until you’re good at it. Tool #2 @clevergirl
  • 43. THIS MONTH’S DECISION: What Metrics to track? @clevergirl RESIST WHAT’S NEW Ambiguity effect Conservatism Bias Declinism Gambler’s Fallacy Sunk Cost Endowment Effect Zero-Risk Bias PRESENTATION ALTERS BELIEF Anchoring Bias Recency Bias Framing Distinction Bias Illusory Correlation I AM RIGHT, AND WHAT I SEE MUST BE RIGHT Blind-Spot Bias Overconfidence Clustering Illusion Salience Survivorship Bias Availability Selective Perception Confirmation Bias Belief Bias Choice Supportive Backfire effect Placebo Effect RESIST WHAT’S OLD Pro-Innovation Bias Optimism INFORMATION RECEPTIVITY Ostrich effect Information Bias Bizarreness effect SOCIAL Bandwagon/Groupthink Stereotyping Shared Information Bias Zero-Sum Bias Loss Aversion
  • 44. THIS MONTH: What metrics should we track Information Bias What it sounds like: “Look at all the metrics I can track.” Explicit Strategy: Work back from your definition of business or customer value. Availability Bias What it sounds like: “We measure “value created” with the metric SLOC. It stands for Source Lines of Code.” Explicit Strategy: Start with definition of business value, and let that guide what we measure. Confirmation Bias What it sounds like: “I never liked that idea, and see, this piece of data proves it’s not working.” Explicit Strategy: Only measure the things that are revealing.. @clevergirl
  • 45. 3. One does not get buy in during a meeting. OBVIOUS BUT OVERLOOKED @clevergirl
  • 46. “A sense of willing participation in enthusiastic followers.” Dan Gregory The Impossible Institute, 2016 A DEFINITION OF BUY-IN @clevergirl
  • 47. WHAT I HATE ABOUT “BUY-IN” 1. Nobody knows what it is. 2. Everybody thinks they have it. 3. Once we’ve got it, we forget about keeping it. 4. It disappears when the wind changes. 5. Dammit. @clevergirl
  • 48. The U-BAD Model For diagnosing Buy In UNDERSTANDING BELIEF ADVOCACY DECISION @clevergirl – cc
  • 49. You can have belief without understanding…and that’s cool…until it’s not. UNDERSTANDING BELIEF @clevergirl
  • 50. A decision without understanding or belief…is vulnerable. UNDERSTANDING BELIEF ADVOCACY DECISION @clevergirl
  • 51. The U-BAD Model For diagnosing Buy In UNDERSTANDING BELIEF ADVOCACY DECISION Do they believe in it? Have you seen them speaking accurately, effectively, and supportively about it? Do they understand it? Are they making decisions in support of it? @clevergirl
  • 52. The U-BAD Model For diagnosing Buy In • How do I know I have their support? • Is it fragile or durable? • What next actions might I take to shore up that support it? @clevergirl
  • 53. J A N I C E F R A S E R Chief Product Officer 3 TOOLS FOR UNCOVERING, ACCEPTING, and ACTING ON WHAT IS TRUE. …so that we can be more effective at work • Radical Acceptance (Retro) • Cognitive Bias Salon (Monthly) • UBAD (buy-in diagnostic) @clevergirl
  • 54. “Long is the way and hard, that out of Hell leads up to light.” John Milton Paradise Lost, 1667
  • 55. So, to close, I want to thank you, UK, for sharing John Oliver with us. There’s nothing like a British sense of humor to help us laugh at the truth. @clevergirl