Session given at Poly Living West, October 23, 2010. Poly dating tips from a single poly gal.

1. Poly and Single
Tips and Tricks for Poly Dating

2. Where?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

3. Where?
Hmmm... Hot Bi
Babe seeks couple
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

4. Where?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

5. Where?
• OK Cupid
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

6. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

7. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
• Pagan events
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

8. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
• Pagan events
• Renaissance Faires
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

9. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
• Pagan events
• Renaissance Faires
• Gaming/sci-fi conventions
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

10. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
• Pagan events
• Renaissance Faires
• Gaming/sci-fi conventions
• Burning Man
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

11. Where?
• OK Cupid
• FetLife
• Pagan events
• Renaissance Faires
• Gaming/sci-fi conventions
• Burning Man
• Bisexuality events
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

12. Know thyself
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

13. Know thyself
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

14. Your
user
manual
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

15. Your
user
Tab A goes
into Slot B? manual
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

16. User Manual: Part A
Family history
• Parents: relationship/major events
• Siblings: relationships/major events
• What are your basic traits?
• What is your baggage?
• What do you value in life?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

17. User
Manual:
Part B
How you
work
emotionally
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

18. User Manual: Part B
How you work emotionally
I need to feel...
• Included
• Supported
• Opened up to
• Understood
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

19. User Manual: Part B
How you work emotionally
I need to feel...
Here, let
me help
• Included
• Supported
• Opened up to
• Understood
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

20. User Manual: Part C
How you work sexually
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

21. User Manual: Part C
How you work sexually
I hope he
puts these in
my butt!
What a
lovely pattern!
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

22. User Manual: Part C
How you work sexually
• What makes you giggle/feel weak?
• Which touches turn you on?
• What gestures are especially
meaningful?
• What is a special date for you?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

23. User Manual: Part D
What is sex?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

24. User Manual: Part D
What is sex?
Wait...
what?!
We’re having
sex right now!
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

25. User Manual: Part D
What is sex?
• What is your take on casual sex?
• What is sex?
• What are you into?
• Tried and true turn-ons?
• What are you willing to try?
• What are your turn-offs?
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

26. Second to
NONE!
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

27. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

28. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

29. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

30. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
• spend time together with both partners
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

31. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
• spend time together with both partners
• know what rules and restrictions are being placed on
you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will
be lifted
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

32. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
• spend time together with both partners
• know what rules and restrictions are being placed on
you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will
be lifted
• state and clarify your own needs and wants
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

33. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
• spend time together with both partners
• know what rules and restrictions are being placed on
you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will
be lifted
• state and clarify your own needs and wants
• expect regular STD testing
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

34. Secondary’s Bill of Rights
You have the right to...
• spend time alone with your lover
• spend time with your metamour
• spend time together with both partners
• know what rules and restrictions are being placed on
you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will
be lifted
• state and clarify your own needs and wants
• expect regular STD testing
• explain what you want from the relationship
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

35. Your responsibilities
• Ask about ground rules
• Ask about your partners
• Ask about STD testing and
current forms of protection
• Check in regularly
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

36. Your responsibilities
Did you
remember to get
tested?
• Ask about ground rules
• Ask about your partners
• Ask about STD testing and
current forms of protection
• Check in regularly
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

37. How to
date a
couple
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

38. How to
date a
couple
No, dear,
tonight we find a
Hot Bi Babe!
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

39. What to do when they’re fighting
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

40. Warning signs
• “She’s OK with it”
• Comparisons
• “She doesn’t understand that”
• Life-changing decisions during
NRE
@cunningminx
www.polyweekly.com

41. Poly and Single
Tips and Tricks for Poly Dating