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SESSION 6-BEING A DREAM
RELEASER
Making a Heart to Heart Connection WithYour Kid
Being a Dream Releaser
 Summary of Prior Sessions
 The Uniqueness of Everyone
 What’s a Dream?
 Portrait of a Dream Releaser
 HelpingYour Kids to Dream
 Putting Legs to the Dream
 Dream Killers
 Releasing the Dream Releasers
Summary of Prior Sessions
 Mission Statement- Developed a parenting
mission statement with the following keys:
 Love/Relationship First
 Freedom
 Moving from external control to self-c0ntrol
 Moving from total dependence to independence
 Choices
Summary of Prior Sessions
 Strategy Development
 Shifting from the Disrespect Factory to the Honor
Factory
Summary of Prior Sessions
 Strategy Development
 Create a space where your kid is loved & accepted
 Love Languages
 Speak to their identity & life purpose
 Use your strengths & call out your kid’s strengths
 Coaching Skills
 Listen
 Ask
 Act
 Support
The Uniqueness of Everyone
Mind
Spirit
Body
•PhysicalCharacteristics
•Life Experiences
•Personality
•IntelligenceQuotient
•Emotional Quotient
•Love Language
•Strengths/Talents
•Dreams
•Passions
What’s a Dream?
 Dreams are seeds of possibility planted in
your spirit calling you to pursue a unique path
to the realization of your purpose.-John
Maxwell, PutYour Dream to theTest
 A dream is a picture of the future you want to
live in.
 Dreams are carriers of hope & are not bound
by time or circumstances.
Dreams Are Powerful!
Portrait of a Dream
Releaser?
A Dream Releaser is
someone who sees
the unique
masterpiece you were
created to be and
calls it out & inspires
you to become that
masterpiece,
regardless of your
current state.
Examples of Dream
Releasers
 Regis McKenna
 AOL
 Apple
 Compaq
 Intel
 Microsoft
Mahatma Gandi
• Martin Luther King
• Nelson Mandela
• John Lennon
Portrait of a Dream
Releaser
 The Eyes of a Dream Releaser
 Beliefs & Perspectives
 The Mouth of a Dream Releaser
 Emotions &Words
 The Heart of a Dream Releaser
 Creating a culture of love & honor
Beliefs Are Powerful
Belief
Perception
Thought
Emotion Words
Actions
Behavior
Habit Characteristic
Attribute
Identity
Our beliefs
will form
who we become…
our identity.
Eyes Mouth Heart
The Eyes of a Dream
Releaser
 Looking for the Masterpiece or the Mud?
 Do I restore value or mentally devalue people?
 What’s the mental framework you put people in?
 Do I hold in my mind’s eye the picture of a person’s
true worth or do I mentally subtract value based on my
judgment about their relative muddiness?
 On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate
yourself?
 I always look for the good, the beauty in others.
 I refrain from judging other’s & take time to see things
from their perspective.
 What do you see when you look at your kids?
Beliefs Are Powerful
Belief
Perception
Thought
Emotion Words
Actions
Behavior
Habit Characteristic
Attribute
Identity
Our beliefs
will form
who we become…
our identity.
Eyes Mouth Heart
The Mouth of a Dream
Releaser
 Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
 On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate
yourself?
 I am known as an encourager.
 I am expressive with words of love and
appreciation for others.
Imagine your kid…
…has a sign hanging around their neck that reads,
“Please help me to feel valuable today.”
Now speak!
 Three levels of Affirmation
 Affirm something your kid did.
 Believe something your kid could do.
 This speaks to their destiny/life purpose.
 Call out what could be
 Validate who they are
 This speaks to their identity
 Call out who they are
The Mouth of a Dream
Releaser
Beliefs Are Powerful
Belief
Perception
Thought
Emotion Words
Actions
Behavior
Habit Characteristic
Attribute
Identity
Our beliefs
will form
who we become…
our identity.
Eyes Mouth Heart
The Heart of a Dream
Releaser
 Perfect love casts out fear!
 When people feel unconditionally loved, it creates the
space for people to dream, to uncover hidden potential.
 It produces an atmosphere in which dreams can be
released.
 On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?
 Your ability to build an atmosphere of love.
 I enjoy seeing people succeed. I do not use them to fulfill my
goals.
 Love Languages
 Use yours, but speak your kid’s Love Language.
 Coaching
 Influence versus Control
Helping Your Kids to Dream
 Start a Dream List
 Things to Be
 Things to Do
 Things to Have
 100 Dreams Exercise-Nothing is impossible!
 RecordYour Dreams
 Dream Board
 Dream Journal
 Computer
 Dream Poster
 Dream Box
Putting Legs to the Dream
 Where to begin?
 Turn your dream into a goal.
 Explore the goal
 Develop options-what could you do?
 Chose your best option
 Own it
 Act on it
Where to Begin?
 Which dream do you feel motivated to do
something about now?
 What dream makes you feel alive when you
think about it?
 Which dream would be easy to act on right
now?
 Which dream are you the most afraid of?
Turn Your Dream Into a
Goal
 A dream is unlimited, a goal clearly defines
what you want to achieve by a certain time or
date.
 Successive goals may be needed.
 SMART format
 Specific-clearly state where you’re going
 Measureable-measure progress
 Attainable-within your capabilities
 Relevant-it’s a priority
 Time specific-it has a target completion date.
Explore the Goal
 What’s the background leading up to this goal?
 Where do you see this going? What will that look
like?
 What’s going on inside you when you consider
this?
 What are the most important factors/people in
the situation?
 What’s most important for you?
 How would your life be different?
Develop Options
 Push beyond initial & obvious ideas to uncover
new & outside the box options
 What could you do to move yourself toward your
goal?
 If you imagined yourself in someone else’s shoes,
what options might they come up with?
 Shoot for at least 5 different options
 What obstacles might keep you from reaching
your goal? How could you remove them?
Choose an Option
 Which option will you pursue to move
towards your goal?
 Which options do you want to pursue?
 Which option moves you the most effectively
toward your goal?
 What are the advantages & disadvantages of each
option?
 Which is the best for you?
Own It!
 How ready are you to commit energy, time &
resources to pursue this dream?
 If no one else joins or supports you, will you
still pursue it?
 How important is this dream to you?
 How responsible do you feel to bring this
dream to pass?
 Is this really your dream or is it someone
else’s expectation of you?
Act On It!
 Turn the option you’ve chosen into concrete
steps.
 Turn it into an action statement.
 What exactly will you do?
 By when? Is that a realistic timetable?
 What will you commit to doing?
 No could, should or might
 Are there any other obstacles we need to address
before you move forward?
Dream Killers & Overcoming
Them
 Disappointment
 Disillusionment
 Discouragement
 Unbelief
 The Cost
Dream Killers
 Recognize their current reality &
circumstances.
 Shattered Dreams
 ”I had a dream my life would be
So much different from this hell I'm living
So different now from what it seemed
Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.”
I Dreamed a Dream, Les Miserables
Dream Killers
 Disappointment-Missed Expectations-We focus on
how things should have been & get knocked off course.
 Overcoming Disappointment
 Re-AppointYour kid
 Call out their unique identity
 Call out their unique life purpose that no one else can
fulfill
 Victorious Mindset
 Hope-Believing that good things are coming.
 “If this doesn’t work out, something better is coming!”
Dream Killers
 Disillusionment-We lose sight of our dream
because of the challenges that confront us.
 Overcoming Disillusionment
 Restore hope by illuminating. Bring light &
perspective.
 Share your failures & successes that came through
perseverance.
 Victorious Mindset
 Passionately confront the problem. Do not run
away from it!
Dream Killers
 Discouragement-The loss of courage to pursue
the dream when we don’t see solutions to
problems.
 Overcoming Discouragement
 Encourage-give or lend your courage to another.
 How can you encourage yourself?
 Victorious Mindset
 Everything that happens is preparing me to become
the person I was created to be.
 I am being prepared for great things in the day ahead.
Dream Killers
 Unbelief-A lack or absence of faith.
 If the dream seems to big or difficult our excuses
abound & underachievement begins.
 Overcoming unbelief
 Give them your authentic belief in them
 Who they are-their identity
 In their strengths & abilities
 Victorious Mindset
 My past does not have to determine my future.
 We do not go forward by looking backward.
Dream Killers
 Abraham Lincoln
 1833 Failed in business
 1835 Sweet heart dies
 1836 Nervous breakdown
 1838 Defeated for Illinois House Speaker
 1843 Defeated nomination for Congress
 1846 Elected to Congress
 1848 Lost re-nomination
 1849 Rejected as Land Officer
 1854 Defeated for U.S. Senate
 1856 Defeated for nomination as U.S.Vice President
 1858 Defeated again for U.S. Senate
 1860 Elected U.S. President
 Victorious Mindset
 What do you believe about yourself, are you powerful or
powerless? Are you a victor or a victim?
Releasing the Dream
Releasers
 How do we raise our kids to be who they
are and live out their life purpose in
community?
 Creating a Culture of Honor built on
 Love to create a Safe Place where all can be
vulnerable, known and accepted.
 Sharing Power by offering Choices so that we learn
to be Self-Controlled individuals.
 Each of our kids are unique & have a divine life
purpose wired into them.
Releasing the Dream
Releasers
The world is crying out for Dream
Releasers.
Will you develop the eyes to see what others can not?
Will you develop the heart to love unconditionally?
Will you speak words of life?
Will you be a Dream Releaser?
Feedback!
 How would you rate relevance of what you
have learned? (1 not relevant, 5 very relevant)
 Do you feel you have gained any tools that
can help you parent (1 none, 5 a few)
 Do you have any input on the timing of the
class? (1 too long in between, 5 timing was
great)
 One light bulb moment?
 What would you change?

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Heart to heart connection session 6

  • 1. SESSION 6-BEING A DREAM RELEASER Making a Heart to Heart Connection WithYour Kid
  • 2. Being a Dream Releaser  Summary of Prior Sessions  The Uniqueness of Everyone  What’s a Dream?  Portrait of a Dream Releaser  HelpingYour Kids to Dream  Putting Legs to the Dream  Dream Killers  Releasing the Dream Releasers
  • 3. Summary of Prior Sessions  Mission Statement- Developed a parenting mission statement with the following keys:  Love/Relationship First  Freedom  Moving from external control to self-c0ntrol  Moving from total dependence to independence  Choices
  • 4. Summary of Prior Sessions  Strategy Development  Shifting from the Disrespect Factory to the Honor Factory
  • 5. Summary of Prior Sessions  Strategy Development  Create a space where your kid is loved & accepted  Love Languages  Speak to their identity & life purpose  Use your strengths & call out your kid’s strengths  Coaching Skills  Listen  Ask  Act  Support
  • 6. The Uniqueness of Everyone Mind Spirit Body •PhysicalCharacteristics •Life Experiences •Personality •IntelligenceQuotient •Emotional Quotient •Love Language •Strengths/Talents •Dreams •Passions
  • 7. What’s a Dream?  Dreams are seeds of possibility planted in your spirit calling you to pursue a unique path to the realization of your purpose.-John Maxwell, PutYour Dream to theTest  A dream is a picture of the future you want to live in.  Dreams are carriers of hope & are not bound by time or circumstances.
  • 9. Portrait of a Dream Releaser? A Dream Releaser is someone who sees the unique masterpiece you were created to be and calls it out & inspires you to become that masterpiece, regardless of your current state.
  • 10. Examples of Dream Releasers  Regis McKenna  AOL  Apple  Compaq  Intel  Microsoft Mahatma Gandi • Martin Luther King • Nelson Mandela • John Lennon
  • 11. Portrait of a Dream Releaser  The Eyes of a Dream Releaser  Beliefs & Perspectives  The Mouth of a Dream Releaser  Emotions &Words  The Heart of a Dream Releaser  Creating a culture of love & honor
  • 12. Beliefs Are Powerful Belief Perception Thought Emotion Words Actions Behavior Habit Characteristic Attribute Identity Our beliefs will form who we become… our identity. Eyes Mouth Heart
  • 13. The Eyes of a Dream Releaser  Looking for the Masterpiece or the Mud?  Do I restore value or mentally devalue people?  What’s the mental framework you put people in?  Do I hold in my mind’s eye the picture of a person’s true worth or do I mentally subtract value based on my judgment about their relative muddiness?  On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?  I always look for the good, the beauty in others.  I refrain from judging other’s & take time to see things from their perspective.  What do you see when you look at your kids?
  • 14. Beliefs Are Powerful Belief Perception Thought Emotion Words Actions Behavior Habit Characteristic Attribute Identity Our beliefs will form who we become… our identity. Eyes Mouth Heart
  • 15. The Mouth of a Dream Releaser  Death and life are in the power of the tongue.  On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?  I am known as an encourager.  I am expressive with words of love and appreciation for others.
  • 16. Imagine your kid… …has a sign hanging around their neck that reads, “Please help me to feel valuable today.” Now speak!
  • 17.  Three levels of Affirmation  Affirm something your kid did.  Believe something your kid could do.  This speaks to their destiny/life purpose.  Call out what could be  Validate who they are  This speaks to their identity  Call out who they are The Mouth of a Dream Releaser
  • 18. Beliefs Are Powerful Belief Perception Thought Emotion Words Actions Behavior Habit Characteristic Attribute Identity Our beliefs will form who we become… our identity. Eyes Mouth Heart
  • 19. The Heart of a Dream Releaser  Perfect love casts out fear!  When people feel unconditionally loved, it creates the space for people to dream, to uncover hidden potential.  It produces an atmosphere in which dreams can be released.  On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?  Your ability to build an atmosphere of love.  I enjoy seeing people succeed. I do not use them to fulfill my goals.  Love Languages  Use yours, but speak your kid’s Love Language.  Coaching  Influence versus Control
  • 20. Helping Your Kids to Dream  Start a Dream List  Things to Be  Things to Do  Things to Have  100 Dreams Exercise-Nothing is impossible!  RecordYour Dreams  Dream Board  Dream Journal  Computer  Dream Poster  Dream Box
  • 21. Putting Legs to the Dream  Where to begin?  Turn your dream into a goal.  Explore the goal  Develop options-what could you do?  Chose your best option  Own it  Act on it
  • 22. Where to Begin?  Which dream do you feel motivated to do something about now?  What dream makes you feel alive when you think about it?  Which dream would be easy to act on right now?  Which dream are you the most afraid of?
  • 23. Turn Your Dream Into a Goal  A dream is unlimited, a goal clearly defines what you want to achieve by a certain time or date.  Successive goals may be needed.  SMART format  Specific-clearly state where you’re going  Measureable-measure progress  Attainable-within your capabilities  Relevant-it’s a priority  Time specific-it has a target completion date.
  • 24. Explore the Goal  What’s the background leading up to this goal?  Where do you see this going? What will that look like?  What’s going on inside you when you consider this?  What are the most important factors/people in the situation?  What’s most important for you?  How would your life be different?
  • 25. Develop Options  Push beyond initial & obvious ideas to uncover new & outside the box options  What could you do to move yourself toward your goal?  If you imagined yourself in someone else’s shoes, what options might they come up with?  Shoot for at least 5 different options  What obstacles might keep you from reaching your goal? How could you remove them?
  • 26. Choose an Option  Which option will you pursue to move towards your goal?  Which options do you want to pursue?  Which option moves you the most effectively toward your goal?  What are the advantages & disadvantages of each option?  Which is the best for you?
  • 27. Own It!  How ready are you to commit energy, time & resources to pursue this dream?  If no one else joins or supports you, will you still pursue it?  How important is this dream to you?  How responsible do you feel to bring this dream to pass?  Is this really your dream or is it someone else’s expectation of you?
  • 28. Act On It!  Turn the option you’ve chosen into concrete steps.  Turn it into an action statement.  What exactly will you do?  By when? Is that a realistic timetable?  What will you commit to doing?  No could, should or might  Are there any other obstacles we need to address before you move forward?
  • 29. Dream Killers & Overcoming Them  Disappointment  Disillusionment  Discouragement  Unbelief  The Cost
  • 30. Dream Killers  Recognize their current reality & circumstances.  Shattered Dreams  ”I had a dream my life would be So much different from this hell I'm living So different now from what it seemed Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.” I Dreamed a Dream, Les Miserables
  • 31. Dream Killers  Disappointment-Missed Expectations-We focus on how things should have been & get knocked off course.  Overcoming Disappointment  Re-AppointYour kid  Call out their unique identity  Call out their unique life purpose that no one else can fulfill  Victorious Mindset  Hope-Believing that good things are coming.  “If this doesn’t work out, something better is coming!”
  • 32. Dream Killers  Disillusionment-We lose sight of our dream because of the challenges that confront us.  Overcoming Disillusionment  Restore hope by illuminating. Bring light & perspective.  Share your failures & successes that came through perseverance.  Victorious Mindset  Passionately confront the problem. Do not run away from it!
  • 33. Dream Killers  Discouragement-The loss of courage to pursue the dream when we don’t see solutions to problems.  Overcoming Discouragement  Encourage-give or lend your courage to another.  How can you encourage yourself?  Victorious Mindset  Everything that happens is preparing me to become the person I was created to be.  I am being prepared for great things in the day ahead.
  • 34. Dream Killers  Unbelief-A lack or absence of faith.  If the dream seems to big or difficult our excuses abound & underachievement begins.  Overcoming unbelief  Give them your authentic belief in them  Who they are-their identity  In their strengths & abilities  Victorious Mindset  My past does not have to determine my future.  We do not go forward by looking backward.
  • 35. Dream Killers  Abraham Lincoln  1833 Failed in business  1835 Sweet heart dies  1836 Nervous breakdown  1838 Defeated for Illinois House Speaker  1843 Defeated nomination for Congress  1846 Elected to Congress  1848 Lost re-nomination  1849 Rejected as Land Officer  1854 Defeated for U.S. Senate  1856 Defeated for nomination as U.S.Vice President  1858 Defeated again for U.S. Senate  1860 Elected U.S. President  Victorious Mindset  What do you believe about yourself, are you powerful or powerless? Are you a victor or a victim?
  • 36. Releasing the Dream Releasers  How do we raise our kids to be who they are and live out their life purpose in community?  Creating a Culture of Honor built on  Love to create a Safe Place where all can be vulnerable, known and accepted.  Sharing Power by offering Choices so that we learn to be Self-Controlled individuals.  Each of our kids are unique & have a divine life purpose wired into them.
  • 37. Releasing the Dream Releasers The world is crying out for Dream Releasers. Will you develop the eyes to see what others can not? Will you develop the heart to love unconditionally? Will you speak words of life? Will you be a Dream Releaser?
  • 38. Feedback!  How would you rate relevance of what you have learned? (1 not relevant, 5 very relevant)  Do you feel you have gained any tools that can help you parent (1 none, 5 a few)  Do you have any input on the timing of the class? (1 too long in between, 5 timing was great)  One light bulb moment?  What would you change?