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Training Up Dragons
of Life!
Powerful Parenting for World
Changers
Agenda
➔Welcome
➔Review of Our Ground Rules
➔Sharing our Parenting Vision &
Values and Current Check-In
➔Encountering Our ...
● Keep Confidentiality.
(What’s said here stays here.)
● No Judgement
● Let someone finish their thought
(don’t talk over ...
Course Overview
Where There Is No Vision
Learning to Encounter by Listening
Learning to Experience by Asking
Questions
Lea...
Here and Now
Check-in
What’s been going on in the last
month?
Five minutes to share your family
life joys and challenges i...
Sharing Your
Parenting
Vision
We live in conversation and in a network of
conversations
What we hear + our own conversation
(filters, perspectives, judgments)
What we hear=
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
ABCs
Antecedent
(something
happens)
Beliefs
(meaning we
apply)
Consequence
(feelings,
pretens...
Thought
Distortions
Possible Thinking Errors to
Examine and Dispute
3. Disqualifying the positive
4. Filtering
5. Emotiona...
Encounter
The primary goal is to seek to
understand what’s going on inside
each individual and their needs in
the situatio...
How Well Do You Listen?
➔I allow my kid to express their complete thought without interrupting.
➔When my kid speaks to me ...
Listening Double Exercise
Speaker
Speaks in soliloquy for ~5 minutes about something with some mild emotional weight
Liste...
Parent/Child Experiential Dialogue
Roles: Parent, Parent Double, Child, Stage Manager, Audience
Parent volunteer chooses s...
Resolving Upsets Chart
Describe the Situation
Emotional Intensity
Physical Sensations Beliefs/Values Violated Conversation...
Engage &
Express
What was one “take away” from
today’s session?
What’s one concrete action you
will take to live it out?
D...
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Powerful Parenting Session 2-Learning to Listen from the Heart

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If we want to change the dynamics in our relationship with our kids we need to learn how to encounter situations without pretenses and judgments. How do we do this? Learn to listen from the heart!

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Powerful Parenting Session 2-Learning to Listen from the Heart

  1. 1. Training Up Dragons of Life! Powerful Parenting for World Changers
  2. 2. Agenda ➔Welcome ➔Review of Our Ground Rules ➔Sharing our Parenting Vision & Values and Current Check-In ➔Encountering Our Situations ◆ How to Encounter ◆ Assessing our Listening Skills ◆ Powerful Listening & Assessing ◆ Practice Powerful Listening ◆ One Skill You Learned You Want to Live Out? ◆ Express Listening Sessions 2-Encountering our Situations Through Powerful Listening
  3. 3. ● Keep Confidentiality. (What’s said here stays here.) ● No Judgement ● Let someone finish their thought (don’t talk over each other) ● No Yelling. No Criticism ● Honor each other, Accept each other ● No Fixing ● No Advice unless it is asked for ● Tell only your own story ● Be listening hearts with empathy and compassion
  4. 4. Course Overview Where There Is No Vision Learning to Encounter by Listening Learning to Experience by Asking Questions Learning to Engage by Making Decisions Learning to Express by Supporting
  5. 5. Here and Now Check-in What’s been going on in the last month? Five minutes to share your family life joys and challenges in last month Reflect on how your ‘Family Values’ came into play
  6. 6. Sharing Your Parenting Vision
  7. 7. We live in conversation and in a network of conversations
  8. 8. What we hear + our own conversation (filters, perspectives, judgments) What we hear=
  9. 9. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy ABCs Antecedent (something happens) Beliefs (meaning we apply) Consequence (feelings, pretenses, judgements)
  10. 10. Thought Distortions Possible Thinking Errors to Examine and Dispute 3. Disqualifying the positive 4. Filtering 5. Emotional reasoning 6. Fallacy of fairness 7. Fallacy of control 8. Jumping to conclusions [Mind Reading, Fortune Telling] 9. Labeling and mislabeling 10. Magnification, minimization, catastrophizing 11. Overgeneralization 12. Personalization
  11. 11. Encounter The primary goal is to seek to understand what’s going on inside each individual and their needs in the situation by listening. O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love. -St. Francis of Assisi To enter into a situation or circumstance with no pretense or judgment
  12. 12. How Well Do You Listen? ➔I allow my kid to express their complete thought without interrupting. ➔When my kid speaks to me I give them 100% of my attention by eliminating distractions like turning the TV or radio off. ➔I maintain eye contact with my kid and lean forward to really hear them. ➔I listen for the feeling(s) behind my kid’s message. ➔I pay attention to my kid’s energy level, posture, facial expressions, and tone as well as their words. ➔I don’t rehearse what I want to say while my kid is still talking.
  13. 13. Listening Double Exercise Speaker Speaks in soliloquy for ~5 minutes about something with some mild emotional weight Listener Listener sits directly in front of Speaker and stays quiet Double Speaks in first person, speaking as the Speaker Echos verbatim what the speaker says May enhance emotional content of Speaker
  14. 14. Parent/Child Experiential Dialogue Roles: Parent, Parent Double, Child, Stage Manager, Audience Parent volunteer chooses someone to play Parent Double Parent Double doubles as in previous exercise Parent volunteer chooses someone to act as Child Child role plays child Stage Manager sets the scene, instructs and intervenes as appropriate After dialogue: de-role
  15. 15. Resolving Upsets Chart Describe the Situation Emotional Intensity Physical Sensations Beliefs/Values Violated Conversation/QuestionsBegin End Emotional Intensity (Begin) Rate the intensity level of the upset on a scale of 1-10. (1 minimal, 10 maximum) Physical Sensations Describe the physical sensations that you experience in the situation. Beliefs/Values Violated Briefly describe your personal values/beliefs that were violated in the situation. Conversation/Questions Review the situation and determine the key points you would like to discuss in order to resolve the upset.
  16. 16. Engage & Express What was one “take away” from today’s session? What’s one concrete action you will take to live it out? Declare it! “I will…”
  • OlivierLavauWira

    Oct. 24, 2016

If we want to change the dynamics in our relationship with our kids we need to learn how to encounter situations without pretenses and judgments. How do we do this? Learn to listen from the heart!

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