About A proper and undistorted intimate relationship is a mutual and continuous gifting of the self to the other. The gift of self to another is misconstrued when thought of as an offer to produce or enact some future state of affairs with the other. The gift is present now; it is on offer now. It is not a promise of a future deliverable. It is not a proposition to be or do anything but a willing self-exposure, a free opening to another's gaze through which one permits oneself to be known in hopes of being appreciated and at risk of being scorned."
-Talbot Brewer, UVA philosophy professor